
On my way to a meeting this fine September evening, I stopped in at the local corner store for a cup 'o' joe.
While quickly filling my cup, I happened to hear one of the
local skels chatting up the guy behind the counter, and an associated skel. Maybe you know the type - barely employable, but seemingly with enough cash on a daily basis for smokes, a six-pack and lottery tickets. usually
driving a hoopdy, unless of course they have had their license revoked for their 3rd DWI and they are cruisin' the streets on a beater bike.
And the conversation revolved around the wonderful world of scratch-off lottery tickets. "You gotta scratch a lot of them to win some dough!" he says. Now, I took a little philosophy and logic in college, but this guy may be a
modern-day Descartes. He proceeded to scratch furiously at various colorful little cards that promised much, but gave little. "That card's a bitch; she's always taking my money!" Wow. Are we taking cards or significant others here, professor? I wanted to stick around to see if this guy hit the jackpot, but something tells me that wasn't happening.
SO I begin to reminisce about the days when I worked in a liquor store, and we sold lottery tickets. We had a lot of people we ID'd as "Lottery Comics" - you know the type - the ones who might loudly announce to all in line for the big one, "don't bother, I got the winning numbers here!" Funny. Especially the chuckle and snort they exhale after that bit of comedic genius. Lottery comics often wear plaid pants and windbreakers, just so you know.
Here's what I do know - The Lottery Sucks. It is designed to syphon off every last dollar you have in the glimmer of hope that you will win millions. But you keep on playing. Losers.
Wow, I really got angry at the end...