Eleven

Remember this little gem? No? Then make sure you read it first before we go on. I'll wait.


OK, good to see you back.

Anyhoo, a couple of nights ago I had to hit the ATM for some pocket-dough. About 7:40PM by the glow of the dashboard clock. Compact-size Hyundai in front of me at the drive-up. And it had been there when I pulled past and around.

First I notice that this 'convenience bankee' (a female) had a dog on her lap. Then I notice the car isn't actually running. OK. Swipe one....guess that didn't work. Swipe two, no soap. Swipe three, I notice the hand is curled in that "I will continue swiping this card until it works" position. Swipe four, looks like we have something here. A few buttons being pressed, a receipt is printed and...

Swipe five - I guess we have some more transactions going on. Maybe we're cashing all of our public assistance checks? But that didn't work. Swipe six, no good. Swipe seven and eight are rapid fire, and by now some poor schnook is behind me, so I am trapped. By now it is 7:46. I'm getting angry. I've been yelling out the number every time she swiped since I counted four. The dog is moving around. Some kind of deposit. My turn is next...but no.

SWIPE NINE, SWIPE TEN, SWIPE ELEVEN!!!! Now we are apparently taking out some money, no doubt for something important. And just like that, after eight minutes I'll never get back, the car is started and pulls slowly forward. Maybe the dog was driving. I hope you had a fender-bender on the way home.

Inconsiderate B***h.